Aching Heart

I haven’t posted anything since Monday, which is quite unlike me. I haven’t taken a single photograph since last Sunday and I’ve just been getting by with the cooking, not really thinking too hard about what I will post on here. Not really knowing what to write if I were to sit down to post something.

The truth is that this week has completely changed our lives, I can’t even say whether it has changed for the better or not because we really wont know that until the dust has settled, it might take a long time for the dust to settle. Change is difficult, particularly unexpected change. This coming from someone who left behind everything to move from the UK to the US with a single suitcase, then moved again to Germany with a husband and infant a year and a half after that. No matter, change is still difficult.

I kind of want to say that I’ll post again regularly when things return to normal, but things wont return to what we’ve come to think of as normal again. So perhaps amid all of the chaos I can come back here to write, if you’ll have me. I don’t think I’ve ever said this here before, but I really appreciate every single last one of you who stops by to read. I’m sorry I don’t say that more often.

To add to the rather bizarre chaos of this week, my dishwasher also exploded. This is just a random unrelated side note, it has nothing to do with what is going on in our lives. Quite literally, in the middle of the rinse cycle there was a bang and smoke, I opened the door to find the heating element red hot and completely split open. It was lucky that we were in the house, so I could actually turn it off before it caused any real damage. I had a “new to me” dishwasher delivered this morning at 8am, the repair men having a good laugh at the old ages of my appliances. The dishwasher was from 1998, they surprisingly replaced it with a 2006 model after telling me I’d have to just get the old one repaired. I think they hurt my stove’s feelings, she may be old but she does her best.

Of course, I don’t want to worry anyone unnecessarily. We still have one another, we still have our health (for the most part, we’re actually suffering from nasty colds at the moment), we still have family. Change is difficult, but it can also be just a little bit exciting amid the mess, if you let it.


  1. I hope you’re ok. If you need an ear, you know I’m here. If you need to get out, please let me know. I’m happy to go for a walk, coffee, anything.
    osarah´s last post ..A Jam-Packed Trip

  2. Leanne

    Hi hon 🙂
    Greetings from Australia! I’m a regular reader of your blog, though I don’t think I’ve ever written a comment before. I love reading your posts, I really enjoy your stories and pictures of your days in Germany. Most of all, though, I love reading about Mikey; I think what keeps me coming back is the immense love that you obviously have for your little boy, it’s really very beautiful to read your posts about him. I am the mama of one little girl, and I feel the same way about her.. 🙂
    Anyway, just wanted to write and say hi tonight. I’m really sorry to hear that something (bad?) has happened. It sounds quite serious; I do hope you’re all okay. Sending love and strength to you from the other side of the world – and thank you for sharing your life with us out here in cyberspace! Blessings xxx
    Leanne´s last post ..this moment

  3. Erin

    Hope everything is ok and the change ends up being for the positive!

  4. Just wanted to say hi. I’m a regular reader and enjoy looking at your photos. It’s funny, even though I’ve never met you, and you don’t know me, I feel genuine concern and hope for you and your family that everything turns out for the best!

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  6. my fellow foto lover…

    your words and sorrow jumped off my screen and melted my heart. even though your situation is private (which i respect) i want you to know that you and your family are in my prayers. i wish there was something i could say to make you feel better, but by trying to do so i believe would only be an insult.
    know that if you were standing in front of me right now, i would give you a big hug and we would sit, sip coffe, and giggle.
    peace to you my friend…

  7. Raquel

    I’m praying for you the boys. Wish I could nearby to help out.

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